‘All she wanted was to love you and you taught her that love doesn’t exist’
All she wanted was you. All of you. The good and the bad. The light parts and the dark parts. She wanted a partner. She wanted to hold you up when you felt you were falling. Support you when you were alone. Take care of you when you needed help. Even when you didn’t realize you did. She wanted to be there for and with you for the moments of success and the moment of failure. No matter how big or small. She had nothing but love to give you. Support and respect. And you would take this from her. While giving nothing back. She screamed silently and cried in the shadows. Put on a smile when you saw her face. For the times she reached out she was denied. She learned that she was not important. She did not matter. Only you mattered. Only you would get what you needed. She learned to put herself aside and tend to your every need. Worrying about you and wanting to make your life better. She learned that her needs were dumb. Her life did not matter. She became numb. The only thing she could feel now was he quiet you left her in every night you ignored her. Yet she still waited for her phone to ring. To light up. To give her hope that she was even the smallest thought on your mind. What she got instead was told you didn’t want to talk to her. You didn’t need her, want her. She satisfied your needs and that was what you wanted. You needed to feel loved and taken care of and she gave that to you. Empty words turned to hurtful words. ‘I get it now’ ‘I’ll take care of you too’ became ‘I’m not sure I want you’ ‘I don’t want to talk to you that often’. You were selfish while she was selfless. Giving everything she had until there was nothing left of her. She made sure you had everything and more a man could want. In return you gave her excuses as to why you were hiding her. A woman strong enough to accept you and want you and look past your flaws. She would start to reach out and you ignored her words. She got used to being ignored by you while she packed up items to send to you to make you smile. To make you better. She wanted nothing but the best for you and she was it. She would never walk away from you in moments of need, darkness, or success. You refused to be there for her. The pit in her stomach that would keep her awake at night slowly disappeared. She now felt nothing. It was at this moment she realized something had to change. She would have to stop having hope that you would see her for the amazing strong woman she is. How perfect she was for you. She wanted nothing but the best for you and you refused to accept it. She has no voice when it comes to you. So she screams silently and cries to herself when no one is looking. Still hoping you’re ok and happy. She does not matter. Only you matter. You taught her this and it was a lesson she will never forget.